So Happy I Forgot

My last post promised news and I dropped that like a bar of soap. The good news and my kid coming to town had me a bit distracted.
My scan was all clear and my doctor was very pleased. She only complained about how skinny I am. I think I am a bit thin, but am not really interested in packing on the pudge she seems to be remembering from before treatment. I've actually gained 4 pounds since my last appt. My next scan isn't for six months now. One more 6-monther after that and then it's once a year.

R.I.P. MCA

I'm a bit behind on this one. Every news and entertainment outlet has already done their retrospective tribute to Adam Yauch. All the tweets have been twittered and the faces booked. I write this now almost out of a feeling of obligation. It's not that I don't want to say something about the man, it's that I don't want to think about where he is and where I am.

I was never a huge Beastie Boys fan. To be honest, I hate everything they did before Ill Communication, where they truly crossed hip-hop and metal, not that screamy crap rap they were doing first. Brass Monkey and No Sleep make we want to hurt things. I've liked them since then, but only own one CD, said Ill, and don't have any songs on any playlist.

When I'd heard he had died, I hadn't known at first why. I was fairly surprised, as I hadn't known he was Illin. Too soon?.. Then I found out that he had cancer in one of his salivary glands and things got real, as the kids say. It's a strange concept, that any cancer above the chest is considered to be in one category: Head and Neck Cancer. I'm not sure if brain tumors or skin cancers on the head or face fall into that category, but Salivary Gland Cancer and Tonsil Cancer do.

I find myself wanting to know more about his experiences, his decisions. I can't wrap my brain around why his cancer took his life and why mine didn't. Why his took it after three years. Did he stop treatment? Did he opt for less aggressive treatment? Did he just have a very stubborn cancer? Did it spread? Did it go away only to return? This is our concern, Dude.

Everyone's cancer is different. I guess that's the thing I'm learning here. Why do some people end up losing their bottom jaw and some people can still use theirs to gripe about the food they have trouble eating? Get checked, people.

I have a PET Scan in a couple of hours. This will be my third scan. Second since ending radiation and chemo. Hopefully the area that was a little 'glowy' last time will be gone.

*edit* I'll know on the 10th when I meet with my oncologist.

All We've Ever Had Was Now

Got the results of my latest PET Scan and everything looks good. My white blood cell count is at the low end of normal, there's some "stable" metabolic activity around the surgical site as well as the opposite side of my neck. Doc says that's all normal and she's happy with the results. Which means I'm happy with the results. Two more scans, one every four months and I'm through a year. But we won't look that far ahead.

She was concerned about my neck and the tightness there. Scar tissue and muscle issues and all. She wants to have me continue physical therapy. I mentioned speech therapy and she said she could give me a referral again, but it's most likely an insurance issue still, whether they'd cover it.


The Flaming Lips' "All We Have is Now" (Music Video: Unofficial) from Brent Long on Vimeo.

Signs and Wonders

 

Still more uncertainty.

My oncologist's office called today. That's my chemotherapy oncologist. She wants to schedule a PETscan this week. My surgical oncologist had said that it was too soon since my last scan and that "if he were an insurance company, he'd deny it." I don't know how to take that. I don't know if he's saying he'd deny it because it's frivolous or he'd deny it solely out of keeping costs down. I know I'm going to need one sooner or later. Numerous ones.

So they want me to get another scan in before their contract with my insurance is done, which happens to be the 19th. I still have no idea if that means I'm done with Ironwood or not. I also don't know if they want me to have the scan because they feel it's important to have it under their care till the end, concern for my well-being and all, or if they want to get one more expensive insurance charge in before I'm no longer their patient. The equipment is in their facility, after all.

So now I don't know what to do. I really don't want more radiation if I can help it, especially if it's just to line someone else's wallet, but I don't want to pass up a scan because of penny-pinching either.

Huzzah!

There are always grey areas, but according to my oncologist, Dr. Szewczyk, my PET scans look very good. The material injected into me lights up when there is above normal metabolic activity. There were some areas that were lit up on the side I didn't have cancer on, basically lymph nodes that have had some metabolic activity but weren't enlarged. She said it is most likely nothing to be concerned about (famous last words), but Dr. Rothman will probably want to do an endoscopy to get a better look. Which probably means another trip to the hospital. Which sucks.

But yeah, good news.

Screw Your Weak Sugar

Tomorrow I get my pet scanned again. You know, that whole - inject radioactive sugar in your veins so you can pick up cars like Doc Oc - thing. All the kids are doin it. I don't get the results till next Monday.

I've been eating like a fiend. Still can't taste most sweet things. Fruits and ice creams are pretty boring. Vinegary and other tangy/spicy foods work well.

Completely different:

Flaming Lips have issued a six hour song

A painting and some info

Figured I'd combine the two this time around.

Verge
5" x 7"
Acrylic on canvas

Like some of my pieces, this started out as something else. I just decided to stop early.



Next week will be a busy one. I have a PET scan coming up on Tuesday at 3:30pm. I'm guessing it's similar to a CAT scan, just not sure what the differences are. I just hope I don't have to have iodine injected into me again. That was just too creepy feeling and I hate needles.
Then I have a planning session with my radiation oncologist. I believe this is when I get "marked", Either with dots of ink or actual tattoo dots. This is to make sure the lining up of the beams is consistent. I also believe I will be fitted for a mask at this time too. Basically, a mold is taken of my face so a mask can be created. This will fit over my face and be bolted to the machine's table so I my head is in the exact same position every time and so I can't move my head during the procedure. Glad I'm not claustrophobic.